(W10) Non-violent communication in social media

   Nonviolent communication (NVC) is a communication principle that I apply in daily life for harmonious relationships. This week's exploration of digital citizenship and cyberbully make me contemplate over how to use NVC in social media so that we can build meaningful interactions and trusted relationships in an online sphere.

    "NVC is based on the principle of Ahimsa — the natural state of compassion when no violence is present in the heart. It is a way of being in the world that has the purpose is to serve life and to create connection in such a way that everyone’s needs can be met through natural care" (Marshall Rosenberg). Let the principle guide our spirit and actions. As we shouldn't want or do anything to make anyone feel hurt, the same applies either for virtual or in-person settings. It is first an intention in one's heart. Practically, when we see social media contents or people that may trigger our emotional outbursts, pausing and balancing emotions are important so that we are not inclined to negative thoughts and reactions.

    The NVC process guides us how to be moderate in expressions, which can be employed in online spaces as well. "There are five main elements to the process of Nonviolent Communication. When experiencing disconnection from others, we can use this list to see if all the elements are in alignment.

1. Consciousness: Am I self-connected? Am I expressing myself honestly and vulnerably? Am I listening empathically? Am I valuing the needs of others as my own? Am I committed to seeking solutions that can meet everyone’s needs?

2. Thought: Is there judgment or blame in my awareness? Am I angry or resentful in this moment as I engage with the other?

3. Language: Are my words free of criticism and blame?

4. Communication: Is my non-verbal communication — tone of voice and body language — congruent with my words?

5. Use of power: Do I want to overpower this person to get what I want? Is my request really a demand in disguise? Am I prepared to hear no, listen empathically, and maintain connection? Am I willing to stay in the dialogue until we find a solution that satisfies all involved?" (Walden. M)

As the exposure in social media is loaded within a short duration compared with offline interactions, I think it is practical to apply NVC process for situations that really call for our attentions. Let's say a comment that may cause hurt, or an attacking post. The principle and process help us think twice before communicating. 

    In many cases when we are silent in social media (lurking), it is helpful to be nonviolent in our mind and heart to protect oneself against possible negativity from loads of social media contents. Do not be judgmental or overthink. Accept others' expressions. Moderate attention spent in social media. Have purposes for uses.

Reference:

The Center for Nonviolent Communication. Introduction to NVC. CNVC. https://www.cnvc.org/learn/what-is-nvc. 

The Center for Nonviolent Communication. The purpose of NVC. CNVC. https://www.cnvc.org/about/purpose-of-nvc


Comments

  1. WilliamJuly 21, 2024 at 5:03 PM

    Thanks for sharing this perspective. One thing I really appreciate--and that seems quite insightful--is the importance of lurking with intentionality--that is undoubtedly an area in which I need to grow, so thanks for getting me thinking about some of the ways I can do so!

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